Someone should master a vinyl record. In every sense it is identical to its CD counterpart. However, somewhere in the middle, in the middle of a song, for about a minute, the artist should make the record sound like it’s skipping and repeating five seconds of one part of the soing. Then, anyone who owns the record would inevitably go over to it and bump the needle. Ingenious! In the decades of vinyl records, how come no one has ever done this? Maybe it was during that time when I wasn’t born…

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